“WITH LOVE, MOTHER.”

Iyanuoluwa Adewole

Art of Creative Unity Award 2021 | First Prize

[August 22, 1968]

Dearest Enioluwafe, I can’t hear the birds singing today again. Maybe they’ve been scared off by the booming sounds of gunshots, or probably the fear of being shot. The sun is shining just like every other day but I feel gloomy inside, not because you are kicking inside of me but I fear that you might not see the sun rise nor set. I don’t even know if you are a girl or a boy, but if you are a girl, I hope your skin shines black like mine with brown curly afro on your beautiful head and if you are a boy, I hope you have your father’s dimple and height.

If you are reading this (I pray I am still here then) then hopefully this ordeal becomes history that you learn at school and not your future. The day the war started I was at my aunt’s place (that one aunt that never minds her business) laughing and cooking, I have always been prepared for everything in life, but this was one thing that threw me off balance. Life doesn’t tell you that blood spills faster, or that one has to be an “usain” so as to avoid being blown up, or that we all become mere men, only war can. I don’t want to narrate every of my experience here, just remember me not as a woman hiding from agnostic militants with other refugees but as friend who is teaching you one or two things about life.

P.S. please don’t have your father’s sense of humor.

[ August 23, 1968]

Dearest Enioluwafe, so sorry I missed yesterday’s entry. I’m feeling a little blue. Inaya lost her little girl today, the lack of food and water is starting to get to even children and it scares me that the chances of you coming to this world reduces every day. Sometimes I wonder, if I should let you come or send you back to a place filled with happiness...

P.S. sorry for the short entry.

[ September 4, 1968]

Dearest Enioluwafe, do you know why I named you that lovely name; it means “the one who the lord loves” at this stage my faith in God continues to dwindle but Inaya’s encouragement has kept me going; Inaya, is a beautiful woman who practices Islam, our beliefs have never been more contradicting. Despite all this, we come and stand together regardless of our religion, sometimes I wonder if war brings us closer than we realize or if it tears us apart.

P.S. love all regardless.

[September 5, 1968]

Dearest Enioluwafe, let me tell you a story; there once lived a man, who lost his only daughter, because she sacrificed herself to save a little child you see, a human sacrifice is something the almighty cannot predict. It’s a momentary instinct and a choice solely made by that human. Nevertheless, this old man refused to heal (if you have a cut and you refuse to treat it, it will fester and ultimately turn into something else) so he refused to heal and in turn he became sick and slept forever. One thing you should always remember is to HEAL, no matter what it is and never cut yourself again.

P.S. apply the bandage directly on the affected area.

[September 10, 1968]

Dearest Enioluwafe, Inaya sends her greetings, she says she can’t wait to see you, I guess that makes it the both of us. The greatest things in life sometimes comes from unexpected places. In the real world; I’m a Christian while Inaya is a Muslim but in here with nothing but embattled people, the religion here is simply humanity. Funny how we find compassion, love and unity in a place where it doesn’t abode. War exposes you to a lot of things and human nature; one thing nobody told me was that as much war brings separation, it brings people together also; before this war I was a prejudiced Christian, if you were not serving my God, you were damned to hell, having successfully integrated with a better understanding I can proudly tell you that one of the kindest souls have ever met is Inaya.

P.S check the darkness for light.

[September 17, 1968]

Dearest Enioluwafe, I love you so much.

P.S. never doubt it.

[December 20, 1968]

Dearest Enioluwafe, you are getting bigger every day and it makes me so happy to see you grow inside of me. You are my life, and ask heaven for permission; may I not go, may I stay by your side for one hundred years more. The days show no sign of being bright but with you here I am going to overcome. Honestly, every day is tough; there is no chocolate cream soldiers here but ones who wants to see you bathed in red. Hopefully the world is all rainbows and kittens when you come out and if its not, we will paint it that way.

P.S. you are my greatest reward in this lifetime.

[January 20, 1969]

Dearest Enioluwafe, this might be my last entry to you, Inaya is not here to say hi to you. I hope you see this as my love letter to you, this is not me writing about war to you but showing you in my little way that humanity’s greatest weapon is unity and love regardless of who we are, that is how I survived this long. I have healed from my own cut, please take great care to heal from yours, I love you so much and more. I hope you overcome this.

With love, mother.

[ January 20, 2021]

Dearest Mother, I’m so sorry it took me this long to reply. Your ordeal is something we learnt at school, of course with some facts distorted to suit political ambitions. I tried painting the world with rainbows but it seems the world doesn’t do colorful. The world is still at war, maybe not with real guns and bombs (we still have those) but with religion and ethnic diversity causing sabre-rattling events benefitting money hungry political aides.

The world is not different from how you left it but regardless people have learnt how to come together (marriage, politics, ethnicity, friendship, etc.) for a better tomorrow.

I love you much mother and with all sincerity, thank you.

P.S. I healed; it took me time to but I got there.

P.P.S. Unfortunately I have father’s sense of humor.